TheMetalChick needs to shut up...

Mitzi Dupree · Post by **Mitzi Dupree** » Fri Apr 06, 2007 7:08 pm

*ring*

*ring*

J: Hello?

R: Hey Jack, what are you doing?

J: Kickin’ back, drinkin’ a beer.

R: Hey, can I borrow your digital camera?

J: Sure. Come on over.

R: Uh. Um. Could you come over here?

J: Jesus Christ, Rev, not only do you want to borrow my camera, but you want me to fucking DELIVER it?

R: Um. Uh. Well, actually I was hoping you could take a picture of me....

J: What the fuck for? I don’t want a goddamn picture of you. That’s what you gave me for Christmas, remember? A whole fucking photo album full of your pictures.

R: I’ll give you beer.

J: Be right over

*********

*knock knock knock*

R: I’m out back!

J: Okay, dude, let’s make this quick

R: Just take a picture of me sitting here with my computer

J: *click* ......done

R: Do I look cool? Let me see it. Oh fuck. I didn’t have my shades on - wait a sec. Okay, now take it again. My hair looks okay, right?

J: Jesus Christ. This better have something to do with getting you laid....

Mitzi Dupree · Post by **Mitzi Dupree** » Fri Apr 06, 2007 7:10 pm

*ring*

*ring*

J: What now?

R: Jack, dude, I need another picture.

J: Fuck off, Rev

R: No, really, it’s important

J: Whatever it is, it isn’t as important as my nap

R: My reputation is on the line, dude. I need this picture BAD. If you don’t take it, the limos might start showing up outside of my house again.

J: You scare me. You’ve started that mouth-breathing thing again.

R: I’ll give you $20

J: Be right over.

*********

*knock knock knock*

R: I’m over in the side yard, man.

J: Make it quick

R. What should I do with my arms? I’m trying to look cool.

J: Stick your hands in your fucking pockets and wipe the drool off your chin.

*click*

R: Heh, heh, heh. This will show those jealous motherfuckers. They are obsessed with me. They eat sleep and breathe me. I’m the center of their universe. I am their god. Their almighty deity. They sacrifice goats for me. They fall to their knees and worship me. And my car. And my gigs. And my....Jack? Jack? Hey man, where ya goin? Why are you running? DON’T YOU WANT YOUR MONEY????

JDV · Post by **JDV** » Fri Apr 06, 2007 9:17 pm

I'm looking at the picture of that car and either Rev is about 4'11" tall or that is one big fucking car.

I noticed that too and to make it worse he is standing on some snow. I'm betting on 4'9".

Hungwell · Post by **Hungwell** » Fri Apr 06, 2007 9:38 pm

FUCK.THE.FACTORY wrote:1) photograph of Lovin' Kry's name on the Whiskey's marquee when they headlined

How much does a band have to pay to play the Whiskey?

It depends upon three things.

1. Day of the week.

2. Time slot.

3. How stupid they believe you to be, ie, if your forehead resembles AREA 51's runway, it will cost you quite a bit more.

Don't lose sight of the draw that this venue has over the common skullet. To be part of something so exclusive that to date only 85,000 other bands have experienced is priceless. What is it worth to you to know that there are but a scant 360,000 other people who have plugged in at the same stage?

To put it into proper perspective, it would take only 18 Madison Square Gardens filled to capacity to hold the sacred few that have played there.

Think about it.

BTW, for 50 bucks you can pay the marquee spinner to write any band name you want for a photo-op. You only have seven chances a week to take advantage of this.

TheScootinator · Post by **TheScootinator** » Sat Apr 07, 2007 12:03 am

BogusInfo wrote:

Sheer Genius!!!!!!

CrouchingStonerHiddenBong · Sat Apr 07, 2007 6:52 am

LMFAO @ "steak and lobster".

So let me get this straight - now in addition to his shitty music, pay to play gigs, metal attitude, and neighbor's car, we're supposed to be jealous of what he eats ?

HAHAHAHAHA!

Yeah okay, Rev.

Aquanetsuperhold · Post by **Aquanetsuperhold** » Sat Apr 07, 2007 6:56 am

Were your friends under a tarp too?

CrouchingStonerHiddenBong · Sat Apr 07, 2007 7:03 am

Rev drinking and socializing with some friends last night:

Hungwell · Post by **Hungwell** » Sat Apr 07, 2007 7:08 am

He paid for the steak, the lobster was free.

CrouchingStonerHiddenBong · Sat Apr 07, 2007 7:17 am

Rev, I went out last night -- I just didn't wake up, immediately run to the computer, and brag about eating at Red Lobster.

But you did.

Aquanetsuperhold · Post by **Aquanetsuperhold** » Sat Apr 07, 2007 7:31 am

If we are filing reports about our Friday night, I went to Woodman's for dinner with friends. Tonight I will be at Ruth Christs for dinner and then walking over to seeing Iggy Pop and The Stooges at The Orpheum. Then might stop over at the Model for a few drinks. There will be no tarps involved and I do believe Iggy is getting paid for his show.

CrouchingStonerHiddenBong · Sat Apr 07, 2007 7:43 am

There is no fucking way I'm reading all of that, but trust me - my presence on this messageboard at any given time is NEVER in anticipation of your clubfisted arrival, so quit sucking your own dick.

LMFAO @ the length of that post.

Aquanetsuperhold · Post by **Aquanetsuperhold** » Sat Apr 07, 2007 7:44 am

To summarize: I'm rubber you are glue.

CrouchingStonerHiddenBong · Sat Apr 07, 2007 7:45 am

Brilliant AND very metal.

Son_of_Sam_I_Am · Post by **Son_of_Sam_I_Am** » Sat Apr 07, 2007 7:46 am

^^^ What did it say?

CrouchingStonerHiddenBong · Sat Apr 07, 2007 7:50 am

Fuck if I know - the first few sentences were implications of everyone huddling around the internet and drinking espresso waiting for Rev to post, so I figured the next 19 paragraphs were full of SCHOOLED, OWNED, JEALOUS and just said "FUCK IT".

SanityClause · Post by **SanityClause** » Sat Apr 07, 2007 7:50 am

He actually went as far as accusing us all of having nicotined stained 15" CRT monitors!

Now that's flaming.

Aquanetsuperhold · Post by **Aquanetsuperhold** » Sat Apr 07, 2007 7:52 am

RockNRev wrote:
Aquanetsuperhold wrote:To summarize: I'm rubber you are glue.
Just so's ya know... I actually believe you went out last night.

Gee you're swell.

CrouchingStonerHiddenBong · Sat Apr 07, 2007 7:52 am

SanityClause wrote:He actually went as far as accusing us all of having nicotined stained 15" CRT monitors!

Now that's flaming.

Not surprising from someone who thinks that posting outside in a Members Only jacket is the epitome of ownage.

Son_of_Sam_I_Am · Post by **Son_of_Sam_I_Am** » Sat Apr 07, 2007 7:53 am

I stayed in last night. *sob*

I'm so lonely.

CrouchingStonerHiddenBong · Sat Apr 07, 2007 7:55 am

There, there...Just call a friend to come over to take pictures of you to post in a flamewar and you'll be cool again.

Son_of_Sam_I_Am · Post by **Son_of_Sam_I_Am** » Sat Apr 07, 2007 7:59 am

CrouchingStonerHiddenBong wrote:There, there...Just call a friend to come over to take pictures of you to post in a flamewar and you'll be cool again.

But I only had pizza last night, and not steak and lobster.

*sob*

NickoLeeBenante · Post by **NickoLeeBenante** » Sat Apr 07, 2007 8:12 am

RockNRev wrote:I had a good night though... Intimate steak and lobster dinner with friends followed by some drinks and socializing.
Want pictures?

So just to summarize:

The guy who legally changed his name to "Rev", tells anyone who will listen all about how he is ordained, and indignantly defended his credibility as a reverend by claiming to have attended 15 years of divinity school spent yesterday posing for pictures to post in this thread and eating steak.

For those unaware, yesterday was Good Friday, which is one of the most solemn and important holidays in the christian faith. It is the day that marks the crucifixion. While other observant christians went to church, spent time in quiet reflection and abstained from eating meat on the last friday of Lent, the Good Reverend™ (can I get an amen?) apparently had more important things to do.

Just goes to show how credible the Good Reverend™ is, and that his name change wasn't just a gay-assed fashion statement. For Easter, this man of God will be posting a picture of a car that edmunds.com values at $762.00 trade-in value ($1073.00 for a private sale - thank you Jesus) assuming that it has a power moonroof and is in clean condition.

Hallelujiah, brothers and sisters! Can you feel the spirit move you?

CrouchingStonerHiddenBong · Sat Apr 07, 2007 8:15 am

NickoLeeBenante wrote:Hallelujiah, brothers and sisters! Can you feel the spirit move you?

I feel something moving, but I think it has more to do with laughing so hard than The Good Lord.

RockSkar · Post by **RockSkar** » Sat Apr 07, 2007 8:20 am

I'll have all of you bitches know that I'm using a 19" LCD monitor, for christ's sake. I cannot believe the amount of jealousy on this board.

First my car, now my monitor.

What's next, are you all going to get the same hair cut as me too?

Aquanetsuperhold · Post by **Aquanetsuperhold** » Sat Apr 07, 2007 8:29 am

I draw the line at the haircut! I'm keeping my dark and lovely, over stingy and over processed.

SanityClause · Post by **SanityClause** » Sat Apr 07, 2007 8:35 am

19" LCD Sony monitor here too. Not that it really fucking matters....
It doesn't have nicotine stains on it, but there are some dodgy looking white stains splattered on it.
Perhaps a little too much info there. Yeah well, Son Of Sam I Am isn't the only one who stayed in Friday night.

RockSkar · Post by **RockSkar** » Sat Apr 07, 2007 8:44 am

Unlike RockNRev, I played on stage last night lol. Got paid for it too.

Hungwell · Post by **Hungwell** » Sat Apr 07, 2007 9:09 am

RockSkar wrote:Unlike RockNRev, I played on stage last night lol. Got paid for it too.

*pfft*

Big deal.

The real question is will they let you play for free next time?

Nicko wrote:For Easter, this man of God will be posting a picture of a car that edmunds.com values at $762.00 trade-in value ($1073.00 for a private sale - thank you Jesus) assuming that it has a power moonroof and is in clean condition.

BWAAHAHHAAA!!

Luminiferous · Post by **Luminiferous** » Sat Apr 07, 2007 9:22 am

SPEEDYMUFFLER wrote:
RockNRev wrote:In the case of this thread, I want your attention sharply focused on me and I have it. I own you. This is my thread now because I said so and my audience is focused on me and at any time I can cut the jugular of this thread and let it slowly bleed out.
This is old school Sludge, newbies take notes.