Metal Sludge Gossip Board

Posted: **Mon Dec 29, 2008 2:01 am**

The Mummy on Paula Abdul -

Itwalksamongus wrote:Oh fuck yeah. She looked just like a girl I was.... servicing at the time whose name just happened to be Paula. Yummy nums.

Yummy nums!

Posted: **Mon Dec 29, 2008 5:23 am**

Okay, that was about as hetero as a cockshaped cake with ass flavored icing served with on a pink triangle platter with a side of rainbow sherbert.

Posted: **Mon Dec 29, 2008 5:30 am**

Posted: **Mon Dec 29, 2008 5:52 am**

Stop_I'mAlreadyDead wrote:Yummy Nums give me the douche chills.

Even without the "Yummy nums," that post is douche chill city. Any time he talks about sex, he turns into a coy 15 year old girl. "I was, uh....in a...tee-hee!" The guy's old enough to be my dad and he can't say "I used to bang a chick that looked like Paula Abdul."

Posted: **Mon Dec 29, 2008 6:04 am**

deathcurse wrote:
Stop_I'mAlreadyDead wrote:Yummy Nums give me the douche chills.
Even without the "Yummy nums," that post is douche chill city. Any time he talks about sex, he turns into a coy 15 year old girl. "I was, uh....in a...tee-hee!" The guy's old enough to be my great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-grandfather and he can't say "I used to bang a chick that looked like Paula Abdul."

FYP.

Posted: **Mon Dec 29, 2008 6:06 am**

Maybe "yummy nums" is something his nurse says after she makes the airplane go in for a landing.

Posted: **Wed Dec 31, 2008 11:39 am**

Itjogsamongus wrote:I am losing my fucking mind. A Mexican Landscaper is about to think that some Aztec God is responding to his wishes for a Dell Laptop becasue mine is about to be tossed through my second story window.

It is disturbing to me at times how much certain things bother me here. I try to repress it, say its not real life, I can't allocate my emotional or psychological energies to this board, but a few things just fester in me like a bald headed uncle.

I now realize that the Hatas Board is not for the object of your Hate, but for you. Because this shit can become as real as a mortgage payment.

There is only one thing I can think of that I hate more than Itwalks, and its the expression "My Better Half". And when these two things are combined, I become absolutely fucking murderous, I mean kicking the chair back, frothing at the mouth, pointing at my computer screen telling it "I have just fucking had it".

This fucking guy says he's been cool since he was 11 years old and refers to his mate as "His Better Half". I want to make it clear. I am not insulting her, only the use of this expression. Did Fonzie ever call his bitches "His Better Half"? Did Samuel Jackson ever say "This is my motherfucking better half"? No. They did not. You know why? Because its how toupeed men on cruise ships refer to their third wives just before they ask you if you want to swap bitches.

Its the fucking bullshit self-effacement, the "I married out of my league" false bravado, their, previous, superficial middle class derelection glorified and brought to the forefront of any discussion. Its their way of referring to their partner but subversively talking about themselves. And when its used by this creepy, boring, relentless douchebag, a murder-suicide is not out of the question.

^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^
THIS!!! Still laughing at the mental image of Samuel Jackson...

Posted: **Wed Dec 31, 2008 12:19 pm**

So awesome.

Posted: **Wed Dec 31, 2008 2:29 pm**

They were pitching woo.

Posted: **Wed Dec 31, 2008 3:35 pm**

I hope Itwalks uses douchey old-timey expressions every fucking day if it will lead to posts like what Itjogs has put up here today.

Also, the phrase "pitching woo" has always sounded like a euphemism for taking a dump to me.

Posted: **Wed Dec 31, 2008 6:21 pm**

deathcurse wrote:The Mummy on Paula Abdul -

Itwalksamongus wrote:Oh fuck yeah. She looked just like a girl I was.... servicing at the time whose name just happened to be Paula. Yummy nums.
Yummy nums!

I bet if you posted a video for "Oh Sherry" he'd say that when it came out he was making num nums with a girl named Sherry who looked exactly like the girl in the video!

Posted: **Thu Jan 01, 2009 10:57 am**

Grosses me out when he says "I would Pee in her butt"

I have nothing against cats but I would like to grab his cat by the tail and beat the Mummy to death with it.............in front of his mom and dad and a few whimpering chink kids!

Posted: **Thu Jan 01, 2009 11:18 am**

acefrehleysbeer wrote:Grosses me out when he says "I would Pee in her butt"

I have nothing against cats but I would like to grab his cat by the tail and beat the Mummy to death with it.............in front of his mom and dad and a few whimpering chink kids!

Dude, chinks are from China. I think he has nips where he lives.

Posted: **Thu Jan 01, 2009 1:01 pm**

Itwalksamongus wrote:Oh fuck yeah. She looked just like a girl I was.... servicing at the time whose name just happened to be Paula. Yummy nums.

That's gayer than Liberace's corpse felching Rock Hudson's corpse...but much creepier.

Posted: **Sat Jan 03, 2009 7:30 am**

I can imagine ItWalks saying 'Yummy nums'.

And then putting his teeth back in.

Posted: **Sun Jan 11, 2009 1:19 pm**

Read the fucking post and tell me that doesn't sound like Punk. These two butt pounders need to get the fuck out of here.

Posted: **Sun Jan 11, 2009 7:14 pm**

I love how the old fuck gets fucking made fun of for being an old fuck like anyone here is not going to grow old themselves.... At least he fucker has his hair and it's skinny which surpasses most of the fucks here like Fat Fuck Stoner who isn't even as old as him...

Doesn't that bother you? being younger but FAT? how is it that an old man can beat you at that ! even if he's fucking stupid....

And getting pissed off over a phrase he says repeatedly " The better half "

Jesus....

Man if you happen to explode, just before you do it.... have it on a live webcam... Because watching a person get extremely pissed off as to going bat shit over a phrase by some poster in a messageboard, is fucking hilarious.... just as hilarious as counter strike nerds going batshit because they suck

Posted: **Sun Jan 11, 2009 7:46 pm**

It's cute how you still mention me even though I totally forgot who you are.

And by cute, I really mean "Totally pathetic, you geriatric sack-riding waste of bandwidth".

Posted: **Sun Jan 11, 2009 11:56 pm**

CrouchingStonerHiddenBong wrote:It's cute how you still mention me even though I totally forgot who you are.

And by cute, I really mean "Totally pathetic, you geriatric sack-riding waste of bandwidth".

Thanks for considering i'd care if you knew who I was or not..

Posted: **Mon Jan 12, 2009 3:02 am**

LMFAO @ "consider".

Get the fuck out of here.

I don't "consider" you anything but a fucking groupie.

Posted: **Mon Jan 12, 2009 5:03 am**

Or Lickety.

Posted: **Mon Jan 12, 2009 6:58 am**

Skate4RnR wrote:Read the fucking post and tell me that doesn't sound like Punk. These two butt pounders need to get the fuck out of here.

You sayin you want a piece of me, bitch tits?

Posted: **Mon Jan 12, 2009 8:09 am**

CrouchingStonerHiddenBong wrote:LMFAO @ "consider".

Get the fuck out of here.

I don't "consider" you anything but a fucking groupie.

Groupie?

Hahahahaha that's fucking insane seeing as i'm the one that goes against everything you all stand for, which is a fucking ass kissing circle jerk...

You take this shit too serious OLD FAT WOMAN...

Relax.... fatty

Posted: **Mon Jan 12, 2009 8:22 am**

Okay, let me get this straight..you're the one that follows me around like a lovestruck fanboy, using the most played out insults in the history of insulting women on the internet just to get my attention, but I'M the one that takes this to seriously?

LMFAO!

What's next...Godiva chocolates and an insistence that I live in my mom's basement?

Son, I suggest you call down to the truckstop and have someone go pull your tired ass lot lizard of a mom out of the parking lot and make her throw the titty in your slack-jawed mouth that you've so obviously been lacking for the past 30 years and quit following the scent of dick to me.

Posted: **Mon Jan 12, 2009 8:30 am**

Zakk?

Posted: **Mon Jan 12, 2009 10:03 am**

CrouchingStonerHiddenBong wrote:Okay, let me get this straight..you're the one that follows me around like a lovestruck fanboy, using the most played out insults in the history of insulting women on the internet just to get my attention, but I'M the one that takes this to seriously?

LMFAO!

What's next...Godiva chocolates and an insistence that I live in my mom's basement?

Son, I suggest you call down to the truckstop and have someone go pull your tired ass lot lizard of a mom out of the parking lot and make her throw the titty in your slack-jawed mouth that you've so obviously been lacking for the past 30 years and quit following the scent of dick to me.

That's hilarious! the pot is getting to your head! is it that good?

I don't follow you around...

Why exert so much energy if i'm so meaningless?

You think your mummy shit isn't played out as my dumb pathetic fat jokes?

All I need is to say very little to get a huge rise out of you and all you get is very little from me from your long dumb attempt to insult me as if I were stupid enough to take offense as to what is said on a message board...

Nigga please!

Posted: **Mon Jan 12, 2009 11:49 am**

Pr0sthetics, serious question - do you really think this shit takes a lot of effort? I mean, I know it takes you a few hours to string a few mult-syllabic non-sequitirs together, but you do realize the average person only needs about 3 minutes to come up with this stupid shit, right?

The fact that you think it requires energy, thought, and consideration is more of a reflection on your own (dis)abilities, investment, and effort in this shit than all The Dozens in the world, you attention-starved chubby chaser.

The fact is that when you're not buzzing around me like a mongoloid gnat with an Oedipal Complex, I completely forget you exist. But if it makes your concave penis poke out long enough to get a quick stroke in, far be it from me to take any of this away from you. Because even though I'm a raging cunt, I have a soft spot for my groupies and I realize that even retards need to get a nut sometime.

So stroke away my little mentally deficient fanboy, stroke away...

Posted: **Mon Jan 12, 2009 12:16 pm**

Stop_I'mAlreadyDead wrote:Yummy Nums give me the douche chills.

Yummy Nums could give Shirley Temple douche chills ... Blech!

Posted: **Mon Jan 12, 2009 12:20 pm**

Punk wrote:
Skate4RnR wrote:Read the fucking post and tell me that doesn't sound like Punk. These two butt pounders need to get the fuck out of here.
You sayin you want a piece of me, bitch tits?

Jacked up and good to go!

Posted: **Sat Sep 06, 2014 1:09 pm**

Yummy num BUMP!

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