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Congratulations, X_SlaytallicA_X!

Posted: Fri Jan 23, 2009 9:27 am
by SebastianLeeDanzig
I... I don't know how you did it. I wouldn't believe it if I hadn't seen it with my own two jaded eyes... you hands down outfagged ZakkVanDime lately. Is there any married ex-groupie ho twice your age left that you haven't hit on? Seriously, just because you were retarded enough to get engaged at, what, like 15, doesn't mean that you just barely escaped lifelong commitment that would require desperate moves on everything that remotely smells like fish.

I have mixed emotions about this. It either means that punishing ZVD on here actually works, which would be a breakthrough scientific insight of epic proportions. In fact, I'm pretty sure if we really found a cure for ZVD, some douche bag could come up with cheap ass AIDS/cancer therapy tomorrow and nobody would give him the time of the day. Anyway, it's either that, or, well, you really suck and I just never noticed.

Re: Congratulations, X_SlaytallicA_X!

Posted: Fri Jan 23, 2009 9:38 am
by saracapri
I do not smell like fish!

Re: Congratulations, X_SlaytallicA_X!

Posted: Fri Jan 23, 2009 9:48 am
by Mitzi Dupree
SebastianLeeDanzig wrote:Is there any married ex-groupie ho twice your age left that you haven't hit on?

That would be me.

I just don't have what he needs.

Re: Congratulations, X_SlaytallicA_X!

Posted: Fri Jan 23, 2009 9:52 am
by SebastianLeeDanzig
Yeah, I know what you mean. Unless you were thinking about extraordinary, dry wit or something. Then I had no idea. I meant middle age.

Re: Congratulations, X_SlaytallicA_X!

Posted: Fri Jan 23, 2009 10:02 am
by saracapri
I think it's funny that you really believe some 18 year old kid is sincerely hitting on us old bags. I can't speak for the other heifers he's hit on, but his hitting on me is nothing but a joke started in chat a long time ago.

Re: Congratulations, X_SlaytallicA_X!

Posted: Fri Jan 23, 2009 10:11 am
by cookie
I'm not married, but definately a heiffer....

Re: Congratulations, X_SlaytallicA_X!

Posted: Fri Jan 23, 2009 10:12 am
by SebastianLeeDanzig
Thanks for clearing that up, sara. Now I only need help with how that's not fucking lame to that extent.

Look, I don't really despise this subject in particular, I'm an equal opportunity hater. And what's good enough for Zakk seems to fit Slaytallica just fine.

Re: Congratulations, X_SlaytallicA_X!

Posted: Fri Jan 23, 2009 10:14 am
by Mitzi Dupree
SebastianLeeDanzig wrote:Yeah, I know what you mean. Unless you were thinking about extraordinary, dry wit or something. Then I had no idea. I meant middle age.
I'm not sure if that was a backhanded compliment or a brutal flame, but really, it doesn't matter.

What does matter is that this little fuck has shunned my cougar agenda.

It's always "Sara this...Sara that....Sara does it better than you," blah, blah, blah.

I think the fact that I embrace and promote his beloved metal culture scares him, not to mention wrecking that whole "mother figure" fantasy he's got going.

At least that's what I'm going to console myself with.

Re: Congratulations, X_SlaytallicA_X!

Posted: Fri Jan 23, 2009 11:02 am
by chickenona
It's only because he knows we have the best weed.

Re: Congratulations, X_SlaytallicA_X!

Posted: Fri Jan 23, 2009 11:06 am
by SebastianLeeDanzig
Now with all you wenches around, he should feel right at home. I'm waiting.

Re: Congratulations, X_SlaytallicA_X!

Posted: Fri Jan 23, 2009 11:34 am
by Punk
SebastianLeeDanzig wrote:Thanks for clearing that up, sara. Now I only need help with how that's not fucking lame to that extent.
LMBIH

Re: Congratulations, X_SlaytallicA_X!

Posted: Fri Jan 23, 2009 1:15 pm
by X_SlaytallicA_X
Wooow, I haven't had my own thread on Hatas since someone though I was an alt. Man, this is quite an achievement, I must say. I'll have you know, this is such big news, it strayed into my real life. I hopped out of the shower, checked my voicemail, and had a fellow sludger inform me that I had my own thread on hata's. :lol:

Also; You, sir, are and idiot.


chickenona wrote:It's only because he knows we have the best weed.
:lol:

Re: Congratulations, X_SlaytallicA_X!

Posted: Fri Jan 23, 2009 1:22 pm
by SebastianLeeDanzig
X_SlaytallicA_X wrote:I'll have you know, this is such big news, it strayed into my real life. I hopped out of the shower, checked my voicemail, and had a fellow sludger inform me that I had my own thread on hata's. :lol:
Well done. I don't even know why, but I had these crazy expectations that you'd at least put up a teensy-weensy fight, dissing me in a future tattoo or something. But yeah, that totally works for me. The smiley seals it. A+++. Would hate on you again.

Re: Congratulations, X_SlaytallicA_X!

Posted: Fri Jan 23, 2009 1:24 pm
by X_SlaytallicA_X
Mitzi Dupree wrote:What does matter is that this little fuck has shunned my cougar agenda.

It's always "Sara this...Sara that....Sara does it better than you," blah, blah, blah.

I think the fact that I embrace and promote his beloved metal culture scares him, not to mention wrecking that whole "mother figure" fantasy he's got going.

At least that's what I'm going to console myself with.
Hey, hey, relax, baby, I'm not shunning anyone's agenda. I've got a lot of cougars and MILF's to pine for, and I can't do y'all at once. Calm down, I'll get to you, I promise.

And I can't deny I've got a little MILF-crush on sara. But what can I say, she was my first!

Re: Congratulations, X_SlaytallicA_X!

Posted: Fri Jan 23, 2009 1:31 pm
by SebastianLeeDanzig
Holy fuck, don't make me barf on my home turf. Go to the whore board or something. In case you haven't noticed, Mitz already has a boy toy, one who's actually able to present his thoughts in a manner that doesn't make useless old forgotten ovaries cry.

Re: Congratulations, X_SlaytallicA_X!

Posted: Fri Jan 23, 2009 1:32 pm
by X_SlaytallicA_X
SebastianLeeDanzig wrote:Holy fuck, don't make me barf on my home turf. Go to the whore board or something. In case you haven't noticed, Mitz already has a boy toy, one who's actually able to present his thoughts in a manner that doesn't make useless old forgotten ovaries cry.
Maybe you're just jealous 'cause they wouldn't fuck you if you weren't old enough to be their son.

Re: Congratulations, X_SlaytallicA_X!

Posted: Fri Jan 23, 2009 1:40 pm
by SebastianLeeDanzig
Another congratulations is in order if that made sense to you while you typed it. So they would fuck me if I was old enough to be their son, meaning I'm too young to be their son, which could be a hint at them being too old to have kids my age... is that what you're trying to say? Stop cock-blocking yourself, man.

Re: Congratulations, X_SlaytallicA_X!

Posted: Fri Jan 23, 2009 1:47 pm
by X_SlaytallicA_X
SebastianLeeDanzig wrote:Another congratulations is in order if that made sense to you while you typed it. So they would fuck me if I was old enough to be their son, meaning I'm too young to be their son, which could be a hint at them being too old to have kids my age... is that what you're trying to say? Stop cock-blocking yourself, man.

No....no no...just no.

Re: Congratulations, X_SlaytallicA_X!

Posted: Fri Jan 23, 2009 2:16 pm
by Mitzi Dupree
Aw. You have a crush on me!

Stalk me though you may, we will never have a serious relationship. I'm just trying to save you some time here. I only fuck good flamers.

Re: Congratulations, X_SlaytallicA_X!

Posted: Fri Jan 23, 2009 2:20 pm
by X_SlaytallicA_X
ooops

Re: Congratulations, X_SlaytallicA_X!

Posted: Fri Jan 23, 2009 2:29 pm
by Mitzi Dupree
Joeboy wrote: It's rare to find ugly and delusional all in one package.
And don't you forget it, little mister. I'm the real deal. Wanna come over tonight and lance my boils?

Re: Congratulations, X_SlaytallicA_X!

Posted: Fri Jan 23, 2009 2:37 pm
by SebastianLeeDanzig
X_SlaytallicA_X wrote:ooops
No shit, douchemeister. I was contemplating commenting on that crap, but I was afraid of the well-tried and always devastating puppet master defense. Oh no, borderline Metallica reference, that means I must want saracapri too.

Re: Congratulations, X_SlaytallicA_X!

Posted: Fri Jan 23, 2009 2:40 pm
by X_SlaytallicA_X
SebastianLeeDanzig wrote:
X_SlaytallicA_X wrote:ooops
No shit, douchemeister. I was contemplating commenting on that crap, but I was afraid of the well-tried and always devastating puppet master defense. Oh no, borderline Metallica reference, that means I must want saracapri too.
That wasn't a borderline Metallica reference. You're a failure.

Re: Congratulations, X_SlaytallicA_X!

Posted: Fri Jan 23, 2009 2:42 pm
by chickenona
Goddammit, Baz, you just can't let us dried-up old bitches enjoy anything, can you?

Re: Congratulations, X_SlaytallicA_X!

Posted: Fri Jan 23, 2009 2:52 pm
by CrouchingStonerHiddenBong
No shit, what the fuck is this about? It's not like you have a case of the ass over any of the hundreds of titty threads. I think you're just starting Hatas threads to be starting them.

Slay, call me.

Re: Congratulations, X_SlaytallicA_X!

Posted: Fri Jan 23, 2009 2:54 pm
by SebastianLeeDanzig
X_SlaytallicA_X wrote:That wasn't a borderline Metallica reference. You're a failure.
Good fucking grief, this is almost Rav territory. Part of me is such a philanthropist that it wants to believe you're just pulling my strings (yo, sara), but... no, I lied, that's just the part of me that's already in an alcohol induced coma. Never mind.

Look what you did here already. How is Nona gonna get her groove back with you sounding like a fag after finding a way to ingest a truck load of Poppers at once?

Re: Congratulations, X_SlaytallicA_X!

Posted: Fri Jan 23, 2009 3:04 pm
by SebastianLeeDanzig
CrouchingStonerHiddenBong wrote:No shit, what the fuck is this about? It's not like you have a case of the ass over any of the hundreds of titty threads. I think you're just starting Hatas threads to be starting them.

Slay, call me.
Uh, first, I've rebelled like any pathetic idiot like me ever could against those threads; second, handling Hatas like this has been my point all along. Singling out one helpless supertard made this the boring wasteland it's been for way too long. Picking some futile reason to start up a fight (man, I hope I don't have to pay royalties to Slaytallica's sleeve poetry) could, in theory, result in fun. It's not my fault this guy turns out to be a complete fucking moron. I seriously thought he could hang.

You're not really trying to turn this into some jealousy issue.

No, wait. You're not really trying to turn this into some jealousy issue? (Kaos, call me.)

Re: Congratulations, X_SlaytallicA_X!

Posted: Fri Jan 23, 2009 3:08 pm
by CrouchingStonerHiddenBong
You can call me, too.

Re: Congratulations, X_SlaytallicA_X!

Posted: Fri Jan 23, 2009 3:10 pm
by SebastianLeeDanzig
Only if you can make this one of those three-way calls with SlaytallicA. That way I can insult him and at the same time feel superior to Punk.

Re: Congratulations, X_SlaytallicA_X!

Posted: Fri Jan 23, 2009 3:12 pm
by CrouchingStonerHiddenBong
HAHAHAHAHA!

I'll call you "dude" and you can call me "Tommy Chong" - it'll be hawt.