Metal Sludge Gossip Board

Punk wrote:I don't find that character to be retarded.

If you've got a problem with me, which you clearly do, start a new thread. Otherwise, take your limey lips and suck a fucking dick, thesaurus boy.

I hesitated about whether I should take up Punk's invitation - after all, this has become the Gentility Board as of late. However, in light of this sick burn, I felt a response was appropriate. You see, I don't even dislike the guy - I just wonder if there's any substance behind his sub-Quagmire schtick he's been dining out on for so long. Thus, I was intrigued to see what he could come up with. In essence, it was this;

1) I am British

2) I should, perhaps, suck a cock

3) I have a decent vocabulary

As you may well imagine, I was reeling after such a strong - and original! - denouncement. But, brothers and sisters, at heart I'm a consensus builder. An appeaser, if you will, and so if I must play Neville Chamberlain to Punk's Adolf Hitler, or maybe That Japanese Mook to his Comissar Molotov, I shall. In supplication, I have written a short piece of creative prose about a hypothetical meeting betwixt Punk and I.

A Punk For All Seasons: Or, An Englishman Abroad - A Romance

The arrivals lounge was full. I glanced around in exasperation, trying in vain to find my connection. How, oh how, in this sea of humanity would I meet my host, Mr. Punk? Just as I began to feel the first undulations of resignation rising in me, I felt a presence - of sorts - at my elbow.

"Weeeell, howdy thar, pard'ner! Ah'm mighty pleased to meet ya, Mr. Byford."

"Mr. Punk, I presume," I replied.

"Y' darn tootin'!"

His dialect was alien to mine, but nevertheless I resolved to persist. He seemed, after all, an agreeable fellow, if utterly incomprehensible. He led me to his automobile, a beastly machine with blacked out windows. Mr. Punk assisted me into his vehicle and climbed into the driver's cab.

"Now we're buddies, ah've got a proposition. Why don'tcha suck a cock?" Alarmed, I searched his eyes for meaning. Surely he wasn't requesting that I apply suction to a rooster? I knew of strange and savage customs outside of Britannia, but this one proved particularly perplexing.

"I beg your pardon, sir," I said, a note of anxiety creeping into my voice, "but I feel unable to carry out your request, on account that you appear to be bereft of poultry at this moment in time." Mr. Punk guffawed at such naiveté.

"P'raps you'd like to meet Li'l Punk," my host replied. Aha! Obviously he meant I was to encounter the issue of his loins, Punk fils, a juvenile. At this moment of comprehension, I brightened.

"But of course, Mr. Punk. I would be honoured to meet your child and heir. No doubt he will grow to be a fine, upstanding citizen, not unlike his father."

"Y' darn tootin'", said Mr. Punk as he reached into his trousers, "jes' don't look him in the eye - he gets kinda nervous..."

To be continued...?

What a waste of space this thread is.

You're the idiot who fed the whore attention.

Punk is the whore of attention.

You guys both fucking suck, you vagina mcginestiens.

Fender_baller wrote:What a waste of space this thread is.

You're the idiot who fed the whore attention.

Punk is the whore of attention.

You guys both fucking suck, you vagina mcginestiens.

Oh, shut up.

I don't care if Cliff is too thesaurusy for you dumb motherfuckers. This shit rules.

I really didn't have an opinion about Fender Baller before that post.



I definitely have an opinion now.

Punk wrote:Hmmm...Cliff kinda rules. Perhaps I was a bit hasty last night.

Definitely drunk, but perhaps hasty as well.

I actually <3 both of you fags, but I cannot by any means sanction such behavior as displayed in this reply. You'd better stop dodging this attack like it was a threesome or I'll post all the PMs you sent me the last time you were drunk... err, "hasty".

He was talking about me again, wasn't he?


I knew I shouldn't have sent him those fucking pictures. Or those tit pictures, either.

Punk wrote:Anyone that can come up with something as retardstupid as 'vagina mcginestiens' automatically claims a starting spot on the tardball squad.

Cool, I'm not the only one who was totally baffled by that word.

chickenona wrote:

Punk wrote:Anyone that can come up with something as retardstupid as 'vagina mcginestiens' automatically claims a starting spot on the tardball squad.

Cool, I'm not the only one who was totally baffled by that word.

I didn't make that one up.

It came from Harold and Kumar Go To White Castle. But I make up words in conjunction with others.

For example...

Ass Penis Jerker

Dick McAss Twurk

Cock Suckin', Cock Fuckin' Faggot

Cockwife Bigfaggot

Faggy Lookin' Douche

Wonky-eyed Fagbanger

Gaping Asshole Cumslut.

Feel free to use some.

Fender_baller wrote:

chickenona wrote:

Punk wrote:Anyone that can come up with something as retardstupid as 'vagina mcginestiens' automatically claims a starting spot on the tardball squad.

Cool, I'm not the only one who was totally baffled by that word.

I didn't make that one up.

It came from Harold and Kumar Go To White Castle. But I make up words in conjunction with others.

For example...

Ass Penis Jerker

Dick McAss Twurk

Cock Suckin', Cock Fuckin' Faggot

Cockwife Bigfaggot

Faggy Lookin' Douche

Wonky-eyed Fagbanger

Gaping Asshole Cumslut.

Feel free to use some.

You really want to take credit for these? Are you sure?

Sixdgritt wrote: You really want to take credit for these? Are you sure?

Fuck yea, bro.

Calling someone a retard is ineffective nowadays, and needs a skoach of something more.

Pile on more insults = greater effectiveness.

Punk wrote:Was your dumb ass trying to type 'Vagina McVaginestein' and your retarded fingers puked up that glop of stupid up onto the screen?

You're a fucking idiot.

Aw come on, man.

These insults I'm posting are getting you a skoach worked up?

Quit being a cum fartin' gaping asshole faggot fucker, you cocksuckin' cockfuckin' faggot.

Punk wrote:Are you trying to say skosh, brain trust?

You're really really good at this, kid. Keep up the good work.

No.

Skoach.

s'coach.

It's the word that will eventually make it into the dictionary, created by me.

Skoach means... a little.

Cliff...you made me LOL for real

Fender_baller wrote:

Punk wrote:Are you trying to say skosh, brain trust?

You're really really good at this, kid. Keep up the good work.

No.

Skoach.

s'coach.

It's the word that will eventually make it into the dictionary, created by me.

Skoach means... a little.

Punk wrote:

Fender_baller wrote:

Punk wrote:Are you trying to say skosh, brain trust?

You're really really good at this, kid. Keep up the good work.

No.

Skoach.

s'coach.

It's the word that will eventually make it into the dictionary, created by me.

Skoach means... a little.

Salt.

Punk, I'm sure that in whatever ninth grade classroom this slope-shouldered, booger-eating mouthbreather sits in, those phrases are a wicked, wicked burn.

Respect.

Fender_baller wrote:

Punk wrote:Are you trying to say skosh, brain trust?

You're really really good at this, kid. Keep up the good work.

No.

Skoach.

s'coach.

It's the word that will eventually make it into the dictionary, created by me.

Skoach means... a little.

Just like Fender_baller means....wall-eyed idiot.



skosh   /skoʊʃ/ Show Spelled Pronunciation [skohsh]

–noun Slang. a bit; a jot: We need just a skosh more room.


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Origin:
< Japn sukoshi a little (bit)

Fender_baller wrote:

Sixdgritt wrote: You really want to take credit for these? Are you sure?

Fuck yea, bro.

Calling someone a retard is ineffective nowadays, and needs a skoach of something more.

Pile on more insults = greater effectiveness.

Quality > Quantity

And "bereft of poultry" was excellent.

Iron Duck wrote:

Fender_baller wrote:

Sixdgritt wrote: You really want to take credit for these? Are you sure?

Fuck yea, bro.

Calling someone a retard is ineffective nowadays, and needs a skoach of something more.

Pile on more insults = greater effectiveness.

Quality > Quantity

And "bereft of poultry" was excellent.

Think about about...

Is shithead a good insult?

Or is motherfuckin' shithead better?

YOU BE THE JUDGE!!!!!

I'll be the judge and the jury on this one.

If you really want to insult someone's intelligence, while simultaneously letting them know that they're a juvenile, humorless taint licker, call them Fender_baller.


GUILTY

Mitzi Dupree wrote:I'll be the judge and the jury on this one.

If you really want to insult someone's intelligence, while simultaneously letting them know that they're a juvenile, humorless taint licker, call them Fender_baller.


GUILTY

How did I end up in the Sludge court?

Please, Mitz. Humor me.

Is it because I am getting you geezards all wriled up over my preference to insults. Because I called some people "Vagina McGinestien"?

If it is, I guess my old schtick has aged really well. But you sir, are generic and boring.

For some reason, I find your insults shallow and pedantic. Not only are they unfunny, they're unoriginal.

Sure, I can call you a "taint licker"... but what you're really saying is that I lick ass.

Boring and lame, needs substance.

Throw in another almost dictionaried word like "mongler", you wind up with "Ass Mongler".

That would mean you mongle asses. It gets you thinking about what the hell is a mongler, what does it do? Can I mongle a fart, or a banana, or maybe even an ass?

Who knows? But those are the insults you may find "juvenile", but what do you expect?

I graduated from high school last year, and still find some way to piss off other people with one lousy and usually incomplete sentence.

I'm sorry, it seems I have hijacked this thread.

If you wish, make a thread on me. I love the attention.

Peace, pubie salads that got owned my Fender_baller's own dressing.

You used pedantic in a sentence. You must be really smart and stuff.