Canadian Ted Cruz Running for President!
Moderator: Metal Sludge
-
- Headlining a Theater Tour
- Posts: 6201
- Joined: Wed Jun 19, 2013 5:17 pm
Canadian Ted Cruz Running for President!
Maybe not:
The U.S. Constitution provides as follows:
Article II Section 1 Clause 5:
No Person except a natural born Citizen, or a Citizen of the United States, at the time of the Adoption of this Constitution, shall be eligible to the Office of President; neither shall any Person be eligible to that Office who shall not have attained to the Age of thirty five Years, and been fourteen Years a Resident within the United States.
Amendment XIV Section 1:
All persons born or naturalized in the United States, and subject to the jurisdiction thereof, are citizens of the United States and of the State wherein they reside.
Tea Baggers: Fuck it, let's just change the damn thing, umkay.
The U.S. Constitution provides as follows:
Article II Section 1 Clause 5:
No Person except a natural born Citizen, or a Citizen of the United States, at the time of the Adoption of this Constitution, shall be eligible to the Office of President; neither shall any Person be eligible to that Office who shall not have attained to the Age of thirty five Years, and been fourteen Years a Resident within the United States.
Amendment XIV Section 1:
All persons born or naturalized in the United States, and subject to the jurisdiction thereof, are citizens of the United States and of the State wherein they reside.
Tea Baggers: Fuck it, let's just change the damn thing, umkay.
The Tao of Pooh
- RATTdrools
- MSX Tour Support Act
- Posts: 4259
- Joined: Fri Sep 30, 2011 6:53 pm
- Location: In the Cellar
Re: Canadian Ted Cruz Running for President!
That hook nosed moron has as much chance of being president as Daffy Duck!
- Turner Coates
- Playing First Stage at SludgeFest
- Posts: 42907
- Joined: Thu Jul 24, 2008 12:09 am
- Location: Is Everything
Re: Canadian Ted Cruz Running for President!
"...except for dark skinned ones. We don't want them here. They'll drive fancy cars and take all our jobs and women and stuff."TravisBicklesMohawk wrote:
Tea Baggers: Fuck it, let's just change the damn thing, umkay.
"If someone on this committee then starts talking about somebody's bleach blond, bad-built butch body, that would not be engaging in personalities, correct?"
Re: Canadian Ted Cruz Running for President!
I don't get it. Was he born Cesarean or something?
- RATTdrools
- MSX Tour Support Act
- Posts: 4259
- Joined: Fri Sep 30, 2011 6:53 pm
- Location: In the Cellar
Re: Canadian Ted Cruz Running for President!
He is the male Sarah Palin. I don't why Christian fundamentalist psychos like them run when they know they have ZERO chance to win!
- Turner Coates
- Playing First Stage at SludgeFest
- Posts: 42907
- Joined: Thu Jul 24, 2008 12:09 am
- Location: Is Everything
Re: Canadian Ted Cruz Running for President!
It's about establishing a power base, broadening influence and making connections. A candidate may know they can't win an election, but he/she gains opportunities for networking that they might not have had before.RATTrules wrote:He is the male Sarah Palin. I don't why Christian fundamentalist psychos like them run when they know they have ZERO chance to win!
"If someone on this committee then starts talking about somebody's bleach blond, bad-built butch body, that would not be engaging in personalities, correct?"
-
- "UR GAY!" signed, Stevie
- Posts: 13799
- Joined: Mon Aug 02, 2004 6:52 am
- Location: Germany
Re: Canadian Ted Cruz Running for President!
Are you even too stupid to realize the Christian spiel is just a front to achieve all the political shit goals you unconditionally share with them? Sarah Palin and Ted Cruz should be your dream candidates.RATTrules wrote:He is the male Sarah Palin. I don't why Christian fundamentalist psychos like them run when they know they have ZERO chance to win!
- Danzig in the Dark
- Signed to a Major Label Multi-Album Deal
- Posts: 21633
- Joined: Wed Jan 25, 2012 4:39 pm
Re: Canadian Ted Cruz Running for President!
Worse than that. Canadian.fatbass wrote:I don't get it. Was he born Cesarean or something?
- RATTdrools
- MSX Tour Support Act
- Posts: 4259
- Joined: Fri Sep 30, 2011 6:53 pm
- Location: In the Cellar
Re: Canadian Ted Cruz Running for President!
You want to know how much Ted Cruz is hated even in his own party? Rep. Peter King has called Cruz a "psycho" and "crazy" and he just threatened to jump off a bridge in Cruz gets the GOP nomination!
Don't worry dude, you're safe!
Don't worry dude, you're safe!
Re: Canadian Ted Cruz Running for President!
I have a friend who is quite possibly the most right-wing conservative Christian nutjob that has ever walked the planet. He named one of his daughters "Reagan." I'm sure that he's had a hard-on ever since Cruz announced his candidacy. It came as absolutely no surprise that this was his latest Facebook update:
"We watched Ted Cruz's announcement speech this morning...he is IMPRESSIVE!"
When McConnell was running the Senate race last fall, this guy literally followed him around the state like some Dead Head fan boy.
"We watched Ted Cruz's announcement speech this morning...he is IMPRESSIVE!"
When McConnell was running the Senate race last fall, this guy literally followed him around the state like some Dead Head fan boy.
- Luminiferous
- Playing First Stage at SludgeFest
- Posts: 29049
- Joined: Mon Nov 14, 2005 3:47 pm
- Location: OI! Down here mate!
Re: Canadian Ted Cruz Running for President!
Campaign slogans circulating the internet:
The wisdom of Bush, the fearmongering of Cheney, the ideology of Rand Paul, and the face of the drama mask.
Unemployment down, stocks up, fewer uninsured? Time for a change.
The wisdom of Bush, the fearmongering of Cheney, the ideology of Rand Paul, and the face of the drama mask.
Unemployment down, stocks up, fewer uninsured? Time for a change.
Re: Canadian Ted Cruz Running for President!
So here the question. All of the right-wing Republicans have been screaming that Obama should be impeached because he was supposedly born in Kenya. So what about the fact that Cruz WAS born in Canada?
Explain that shit!
Explain that shit!
Re: Canadian Ted Cruz Running for President!
DaveB wrote:I have a friend who is quite possibly the most right-wing conservative Christian nutjob that has ever walked the planet. He named one of his daughters "Reagan." I'm sure that he's had a hard-on ever since Cruz announced his candidacy. It came as absolutely no surprise that this was his latest Facebook update:
"We watched Ted Cruz's announcement speech this morning...he is IMPRESSIVE!"
When McConnell was running the Senate race last fall, this guy literally followed him around the state like some Dead Head fan boy.
On the plus side, in a few more months we'll finally stop seeing the "Should military service be a requirement for being president? SHARE if you agree!" memes as the dopey conservatives realize that nobody in their queue comes close to meeting that stupid standard.
- Luminiferous
- Playing First Stage at SludgeFest
- Posts: 29049
- Joined: Mon Nov 14, 2005 3:47 pm
- Location: OI! Down here mate!
Re: Canadian Ted Cruz Running for President!
Canada's like the northern USA, we just let them live there and have a border so they can feel like us, so Ted's really a northern American...DaveB wrote:So here the question. All of the right-wing Republicans have been screaming that Obama should be impeached because he was supposedly born in Kenya. So what about the fact that Cruz WAS born in Canada?
Explain that shit!
- RATTdrools
- MSX Tour Support Act
- Posts: 4259
- Joined: Fri Sep 30, 2011 6:53 pm
- Location: In the Cellar
Re: Canadian Ted Cruz Running for President!
Talk about the ULTIMATE hypocrite!
Cruz said he'll be signing up for Obamacare!
Cruz said he'll be signing up for Obamacare!
- Turner Coates
- Playing First Stage at SludgeFest
- Posts: 42907
- Joined: Thu Jul 24, 2008 12:09 am
- Location: Is Everything
Re: Canadian Ted Cruz Running for President!
They don't associate Canada with someone like this:DaveB wrote:So here the question. All of the right-wing Republicans have been screaming that Obama should be impeached because he was supposedly born in Kenya. So what about the fact that Cruz WAS born in Canada?
Explain that shit!
"If someone on this committee then starts talking about somebody's bleach blond, bad-built butch body, that would not be engaging in personalities, correct?"
-
- Signed to a Major Label Multi-Album Deal
- Posts: 22717
- Joined: Sat Jul 02, 2005 5:09 pm
- Location: Toronto
Re: Canadian Ted Cruz Running for President!
That gentleman appears both A) sensual and B) sexy.
HeavyMetalZombie666 wrote:Any chicks on this board like Sean Connery or Roger Moore?
Re: Canadian Ted Cruz Running for President!
BOOM! Nailed it!Wheresthestagemanager? wrote:They don't associate Canada with someone like this:DaveB wrote:So here the question. All of the right-wing Republicans have been screaming that Obama should be impeached because he was supposedly born in Kenya. So what about the fact that Cruz WAS born in Canada?
Explain that shit!
-
- Signed to a Major Label Multi-Album Deal
- Posts: 22717
- Joined: Sat Jul 02, 2005 5:09 pm
- Location: Toronto
Re: Canadian Ted Cruz Running for President!
Hey, we have our share of toughs up here, OK?
HeavyMetalZombie666 wrote:Any chicks on this board like Sean Connery or Roger Moore?
- Bourbon Cowboy
- Playing Decent Clubs in a Bus
- Posts: 1825
- Joined: Sat Jan 10, 2009 9:50 pm
- Location: Bottom of the bottle
Re: Canadian Ted Cruz Running for President!
Is Cruz a real Canadian though?
I've heard him speak in interviews and not once have I heard him end a sentence with "Eh?"
I've heard him speak in interviews and not once have I heard him end a sentence with "Eh?"
muppet butt wrote:You're an idiot if you think he has the ability to ban me.
- Danzig in the Dark
- Signed to a Major Label Multi-Album Deal
- Posts: 21633
- Joined: Wed Jan 25, 2012 4:39 pm
Re: Canadian Ted Cruz Running for President!
What are you talking aboot?
- killeverything
- A Drinking Fan With A Baseball Problem
- Posts: 10787
- Joined: Sat Jan 15, 2005 9:49 pm
- Location: Camp Crystal Lake
Re: Canadian Ted Cruz Running for President!
Connecticut born, east coast raised and educated ( subjective, I know ) George W Bush managed to convince the entire Neanderthal demographic he was just a good ol' boy from Midland, TX.Bourbon Cowboy wrote:Is Cruz a real Canadian though?
I've heard him speak in interviews and not once have I heard him end a sentence with "Eh?"
Don't underestimate what a well placed camera crew and "movin' sticks around" on your ranch can do for your image. I'll bet if you ask him, Ted Cruz will say that he doesn't like hockey.
It's already begun.
- RATTdrools
- MSX Tour Support Act
- Posts: 4259
- Joined: Fri Sep 30, 2011 6:53 pm
- Location: In the Cellar
Re: Canadian Ted Cruz Running for President!
Donald Trump already questioned Cruz's eligibility to be president on Megyn Kelly's show on Fox a few days. I guess we can count on Trump to hate everyone equally!DaveB wrote:So here the question. All of the right-wing Republicans have been screaming that Obama should be impeached because he was supposedly born in Kenya. So what about the fact that Cruz WAS born in Canada?
Explain that shit!
- Luminiferous
- Playing First Stage at SludgeFest
- Posts: 29049
- Joined: Mon Nov 14, 2005 3:47 pm
- Location: OI! Down here mate!
Re: Canadian Ted Cruz Running for President!
Cruz claims he's been a country music fan since 9/11 because they're obviously more patriotic...killeverything wrote:Connecticut born, east coast raised and educated ( subjective, I know ) George W Bush managed to convince the entire Neanderthal demographic he was just a good ol' boy from Midland, TX.Bourbon Cowboy wrote:Is Cruz a real Canadian though?
I've heard him speak in interviews and not once have I heard him end a sentence with "Eh?"
Don't underestimate what a well placed camera crew and "movin' sticks around" on your ranch can do for your image. I'll bet if you ask him, Ted Cruz will say that he doesn't like hockey.
It's already begun.
Somebody put a cowboy hat on this boy already!
- RATTdrools
- MSX Tour Support Act
- Posts: 4259
- Joined: Fri Sep 30, 2011 6:53 pm
- Location: In the Cellar
Re: Canadian Ted Cruz Running for President!
After Cruz made that comment on country music some MSNBC guest said "nothing says killing Muslims like country music". LMAO! The host soon disavowed the comment and said it doesn't reflect the views of MSNBC.