Metal Sludge Gossip Board

Best bugs.

WORST bugs.

They're creepy. They're ugly. They transmit disgusting diseases. When they're engorged, they look like jelly beans with legs.

Bridget wrote:WORST bugs.

They're creepy. They're ugly. They transmit disgusting diseases. When they're engorged, they look like jelly beans with legs.

Sounds like you're talking about penis.

Lesbo.

Ticks can't get you pregnant when they bite you. Thank god.

ETA - Penises don't bite, so I'm not really sure what point I was trying to make there.

Yeah, I was going to say, do you like ticks more than you like penis?

No, I much prefer penis. Ticks are all around gross and freak-out inducing.

If I had known how many ticks I'd see in a single day here in NC before we moved here, I would have insisted that we move to Vt. instead of flipping a coin to decide.

This thread was a trap to get you talk about penis.

So, Bridget, are you a size queen? What do you think of uncircumsized penis?

Damn, I walk into these traps all the time.

No, I'm not a size queen, but having once been jabbed in the thigh by a tiny penis, there is a size below which I will not entertain the notion of contact.

Circumcision is neither here nor there to me.

Bridget wrote:Circumcision is neither here nor there to me.

REALLY.

Hmmmm.

You can learn a lot about a woman by asking them three things: How they feel about circumcision, if they'd ever have sex with a black guy (provided they're not black themselves), and how they feel about ANAL.

Out of curiosity, what does the circumcision thing tell you about a woman?

Bridget wrote:Out of curiosity, what does the circumcision thing tell you about a woman?

A woman who's okay with uncircumsized peni will love you unconditionally. Or she's super into cock. Or she's European.

Any one of those is a keeper.

Hahaha. I'm so glad I asked.

For the record, I've never had sex with a black dude. I'm not racist, I just grew up in the whitest state in the country.

I notice that you're dodging the anal question.

That says two things: You're REALLY uptight about it or you're really, really into it and you don't want to admit it.

I'll never tell which it is!

I fail to see how admitting to loving it up the ass would affect your reputation here.

I don't care if you take it up the butt, Gidget. Really, I'm only interested if the question is met with repulsion. Then I know I'm onto something good.

At this point I just don't know how to answer without labeling myself either GoFlo-light or a total prude.

My favorite response to the anal question has been given to me recently by the girl I'm seeing.

Finally, after much discussion of this and various other deviant sexual acts, she said "What would you do if I came over and just presented my anus to you?"

It was such a funny response that I laughed heartily but the idea was so strange and offputting that I dropped the discussion.

Hahaha.

I have a friend who said that she only had anal sex with her husband once, even though she loved it because "It's like turning sweet 16. It only has to happen once." Her rationale made no sense at all and I'm sure her husband hates her for it.

Yeah, your friend makes no sense.

I wonder what her stance is on uncircumcised cock.


I'm going to try to work your special lady friend's line into conversation sometime soon.

Bridget wrote:I'm going to try to work your special lady friend's line into conversation sometime soon.

To your old man? Let me know how that works out. I'm guessing the box of Cheez-Its will hit the floor.

deathcurse wrote:

Bridget wrote:I'm going to try to work your special lady friend's line into conversation sometime soon.

To your old man? Let me know how that works out. I'm guessing the box of Cheez-Its will hit the floor.

I will. I'm going to test it first on my dear old friend who's coming to town tomorrow. I just hope I can say it with a straight face.

Now I'm hungry for Cheez-Its.

Huh. I would have guessed you'd be looking to call your special lady friend and request some butt.

Haha, nah. She called my bluff.

deathcurse wrote:Haha, nah. She called my bluff.

In that case, here you go:

IDIAMINDADA wrote:Bitches never give up the ass for me, it must by my unwieldy large and cumbersome penis.

It's your cross to bear.

1. Why would you wanna put yo dick in shit?

2. These are the BOMB:



3. "Ticks" is the rare onamonapeic that does not mimic the sound of it's reference, unless the bug in question has an involuntary physical spasm of some sort. Then it's just a coincidence. And spelled wrong. So there you go.

exitflagger wrote: 2. These are the BOMB:

I like that kind, but Mr. Bridget is a purist.